It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I got drunk. Then I took a shit.
It was a good shit
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