STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
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