Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
Randomize
