I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
I mean she's dancing like an epileptic patato and i'd like to slap her
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
try to milk me bitch
Randomize
