I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
i think my mom watched the whole time
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
Randomize
