My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
