he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
