I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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