i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Randomize
