babies were throwing up all over the place
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
