it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Randomize
