Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
Randomize
