no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize