Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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