yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
i want to swaddle you in tequila
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
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