I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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