can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
Come see our sink grown plant.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
I also told the bartender he probably had a beautiful spleen
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
