the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
I forgot how hot balto sounded
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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