it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
my brother is so whacked out on percocet from hurting his legs that he started crying because his belly button was so cute
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
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