Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
