Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
