I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
