help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
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