Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
He was streaking. We were hammered. We had roman candles. It only made sense to shoot them at him.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
