So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I haven't been this sober since birth.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
