I woke up and she had breakfast in bed for me
RUN RUN RUN RUN
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
