Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
you just kept saying 'take out my tanks' and tell the cab driver to go slower, i have no idea what you were talking about but i'm glad you had fun.
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I'm both gender and math confused
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize
