Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
She was all for the threesome til I showed her a pic of my boyfriend. I think I should re-evaluate my life decisions.
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