Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
