Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
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