So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
It's official we're now working from home permanently. I'm getting paid to have sex and sandwiches. I hit the lottery.
Randomize
