i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
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