All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
whose ass print is on the piano?
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
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