Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
I knew we would be good together when you made me lick jameson off your boob while you screamed along with racks on racks
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
2 weeks shy of 25 and all I’m wishing for is a secret admirer who pulls my trash cans to the curb Wednesday morning for me because I always forget to Tuesday’s nights thanks to it being dollar draft night at the local bar
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Randomize
