btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
What's the rule on cocaine before dinner?
Its 11 o'clock somewhere
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
