Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
well seeing as i got a call at 5 am from the hotel manager telling me my cousin was passed out on the lobby floor...not good
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize
