does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
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