Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
