Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Randomize