if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
my roommate just said she thinks she got a flashback or some memory of me getting hit by a car.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Randomize
