Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
