Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I had to warn the neighbors
Warn them about what?! It's noon
"Pay no attention to me if at random points of the day I'm outside with kitty cat ears on" I'm a mess...
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
