butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
I'm sorry I never said I wasn't coming home last night. To my defense I did type and send a text, only I was too drunk to realize I sent it to the guy I was with instead of you.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
