I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Randomize
