best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Yeah sketchy neighborhood.. Some woman ran by screaming, "i didn't steal anything" as some cops rolled up and arrested her.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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