I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
