can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I look better un-naked...
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Just caught my dad doing coke in my bathroom again. Guess whose getting a new car for christmasss.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Randomize
