so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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