So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Randomize
