so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
Randomize
